I like to listen to a pastor named Michael Yousef on Sirius radio while I’m waiting to go to work. I really like the way he preaches his message, very clear and concise and he gets his point across. This morning he was preaching about marriage and how wives are to submit to their husbands. Every time I’ve read about this biblical description of marriage it’s always women up in arms saying they will not be “submissive.” It’s not about being submissive and being a doormat, so far from that. In this passage from Ephesians 5:23-24 explains it perfectly.

22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

No where in the above verses does it say for wives to be submissive to their husbands. As a Christian I agree that wives should submit to their husbands. They are the person whom God has chosen for you to be with. I understand that not every marriage is a happy one and for that I’m deeply sorry if that is your situation. However, if you call yourself a Christian and you are a follower of Jesus, submitting to your husband as you do to the Lord is what you are supposed to do. I know in my experience once I submitted my life to God and learned of this bible passage I found it easy to submit to my husband. I’m not treated poorly or as a meek submissive wife as a result. Nor do I see myself as less than a partner in our marriage. Today in my marriage and after submitting to my husband I do see him as the head of our family. We make decisions together and no one person is seen as “better” than the other. I still color my hair different colors as I see fit and my husband still shakes his head in amusement. Nothing has changed except that he is the “head” the same way Christ is the head of the church. The Bible also states that my husband is to love me the way Christ loves His church

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her26 to make her holy, cleansing[a] her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body.

In my opinion the husband has a greater obligation to his wife according to the Bible and marriage than the wife has to her husband. I know my husband loves me as he loves himself. He takes care of himself and he takes care of me. Nothing is perfect, we are not a perfect couple on a pedestal nor is our marriage a perfect one. But I chose to follow the Bible’s instructions on marriage and it works. God’s instructions work! Amazing but not surprising.

The Why?

Recently a family I hold dear to my heart has suffered an unimaginable loss of their young daughter. Her death was a tragic unpredictable event. One that I can’t imagine living through. This tragedy also makes you wonder why? And ultimately asking God why did He allow such a tragedy to occur. There are no answers. No where in the Bible does it say we as believers will have an easy life, in fact it says just the opposite that we will have trials. It’s just that when we think of “trials” we never imagine the unimaginable. I know I think of difficult times maybe a rough patch here and there in life, maybe some “light” trouble in my marriage that’s overcome without issue and we go in our merry way with life.

Knowing that trials can be literally anything on that spectrum of tough times ranging from work issues to completely unexpected/unexplained loss of a loved one is so difficult. So difficult to accept that when we accept God’s will for the good in our lives we also must accept God’s will for trials we face, no matter how painful and unbearable that trial may be.

I’ve often wondered why God made my son the way he is. When Thomas was born I accepted this beautiful “perfect” baby boy as a gift. Truly a miracle as any child is.. Then the trials came and we realized Thomas had issues. Issues that took us 12 years to get a definitive answer for. Is my son less than perfect today? No. He’s as perfect and wonderfully made in the way God created him.

We will only know the answer to God’s trials and the pain we feel during those trials when the day comes that we are face to face with Jesus. I don’t think I will care to know the “why” at that point. I wonder if I’ll be so in awe of His presence that nothing else will matter.

I will pray for my friend who is going through such a horrific trial right now. I don’t know how she feels. But I know we serve a mighty God and he never wastes a tear.

A year and a day

Yesterday was the one year anniversary of my dad passing on. I actually found out today, the day after he passed. So today it hit me a little harder than yesterday.

I miss him. My best friend put it the best way I can describe when her dad passed. She said, “It’s that it’s permanent that’s what get me.” And she’s right but she’s also wrong. It’s permanent in *this* world.  Not in the spiritual sense. My dad is with the Lord. He’s healed, he’s whole and he is living! Praise God! Even though I know this with all my heart I still miss him and it still hurts that he’s not here with us.

I’ve been listening to Pastor John Piper (if you haven’t heard of him google him. He is phenomenal). My wonderful friend Louise passed on a message that he preached on with him saying in so many words that if you follow Christ you will never see death. Yes you will one day die but you won’t “taste” death. It is a message that I really needed to hear at that exact time. God is amazing in His timing. I’ve listened to that message from John Piper at least 3 times and it’s as great the 3rd time as it is the 1st time. Here is the link if you’d like to be enlightened:

So getting back to my dad. I’ve been taking to my girls about my dad and when I started driving. I don’t know how we ever got on the subject. My dad was a mechanic, that’s what he did for a living. However if you’re ever heard the saying the “shoemaker’s children go barefoot…” that was us and cars and my dad. Don’t ask why but he never taught us to go and get a simple oil change on our cars. So daddy would get us these cars to drive, we would drive them to death and then he’d get us another one. Fun times I tell you ! And God forbid you felt the car was too big and you were afraid to drive it. “Just drive it!” He would exclaim at us. So funny. I still heard that when I had to drive Tommy’s pick up to work when my car was in the shop. I never drove a pick up truck before…Just Drive! I heard in my head. Good advise then and now.

He was a great Dad. Low maintenance, he didn’t like a fuss. Although if you were cutting him a piece of cake it had better be a “hunk” not some sissy little piece. Tommy and I recently bought me a new car this past December. I think daddy would have liked it. Especially that it’s smalller than what I was driving and now I feel like I’m zipping all over the place. It’s great on gas and daddy would have loved that part.

This time last year I was trying to absorb the fact that my dad had passed away, on to be it’s the Lord. My house was 80% finished from our renovation. Today I still have a hard time that daddy is gone and the house is 100% finished. Some things change and some don’t.