Today while I was wrapping gifts, Thomas impulsively hugged and kissed me; about 5 times one after the other. It was so incredibly sweet I was almost brought to tears. You see, I’m not used to be hugged and kissed by him. Growing up his behavior was so unpredictable and I was often the target and recipient of his angry outbursts. I never thought about that too much until today when Thomas was hugging me and kissing me on the cheek.
The girls have always been affectionate with Tommy and me. I mean we had the usual time of “don’t embarrass me” when they were teens. But they always said, “I love you” when they left the house and still do. Thomas didn’t start saying I love you to me until he was about 16-17 years old. I remember how happy I was when he answered me. “Love you too Mom” for the first time. It was while Thomas was in residential school and we left him after a visit.
It’s funny because you really take things for granted. Like that your children love you and you love them. That they will tell you that they love you. Moms love their children beginning at that positive pregnancy test and it only grows from there. And it only grows more intense as the years go on. When Thomas was very young; I remember all the doctor’s visits and then the one specialist who really took me seriously. Problem was the specialist was in Manhattan and I’d never drove in the city before and taking public wasn’t much of an option. Well I put my big girl panties on and did it. I drove to the city by myself. I was proud of myself to be honest. It’s was something I wouldn’t have done if it wasn’t something I had to do for one of my children. A mother becomes an unstoppable force when it comes to her kids and I would dare anyone to try and stop her.
I was blessed today; a delayed blessing of affection from my son. A show of love that caught me off guard and set me to thinking and remembering. I don’t take Thomas for granted. We’ve been through too much.