Since I’ve been working full time I notice it’s been interfering with my posting to my blog, or rather my lack of a commute is interfering. I wrote many posts while riding the ferry to and from Manhattan. Work also interferes with my passion of thrifting. So I feel the need to make up for it on a Saturday. That’s fine too as I really appreciate my down time at the thrift store. It is after all my happy place. Only ar the thrift does one get totally immersed in the thrill of the hunt and take a mini vacay from well, life. It works for me. TJ Maxx will  also work in a pinch. TJ’s has that same thrill of the hunt as you have to search through the racks for something good. I adore the clearance racks and I could spend at least a good hour there if not longer.

So work is the ultimate time sucker. I’m not complaining, I’m really not. I’d rather go to work than stay at home any longer. I appreciate working full time and I like my job and the people I get to meet. The last month or so I’ve been at the medical records department abstracting charts for one of the hospital’s clinics. The people who work there are so great they included me in their Christmas party and even asked me to participate in their “Secret Santa” gift exchange. I loved every bit of it.

Now I’m at a different clinic/same hospital. The people there are nice enough but I don’t have the interaction with the staff as I did at medical records. That’s fine, if everyplace were the same it would get boring so I like the change of pace here and there. Plus I get to people watch a bit and that’s cool.

Next week my assignment is at one of the local high schools. I’m thinking they have a school based clinic and need charts abstracted. That should be interesting. My hours will be 7:30 to 3:30 so that’s cool to be home earlier.

This past Sunday our Pastor kicked off a new series, “Does God care about my job?”. I loved it and I’m looking forward to the rest of his sermons these coming weeks. On Sunday he hit on these three points:

Work is part of God’s character.

God left His work incomplete on purpose.

God created me to work.

Pastor John also said we all have a job whether it be that you’re a student, a stay at home Mom, a nurse, or a lawyer, etc… We are all to do our job the best we can and to God be the glory. I love this. I know I work hard to produce a paycheck and for the satisfaction of a job well done. Truth be told I also work hard so as to not attract unwanted attention from my supervisors. To work for the glory of God is just perfect as apart from Him I can do nothing anyway. God is such a huge part of my life I wouldn’t want it any other way.

We had a guest pastor at church this morning. He is a friend of our regular pastor and from Kentucky. I really liked him and his message which was to not let your past stop your dreams for the future and he told the story of Joseph. Joseph from the book of Genesis who’s brothers sold him into slavery… (Genesis 37)

One of the pastor’s points was that The Lord was always with Joseph and He is always with us even when we don’t feel like he id. I loved hearing that,  it was a great and timely reminder. The other point the pastor made was to not let your past destroy your dreams. We all have dreams I think even more so at the beginning of a new year when things are so new and fresh. Like a blank canvas and our dreams can be painted and and designed to our precise desires.

Like most of you I have dreams. Dreams about my family and dreams about my marriage. A more specific dream is that my son will finally move closer to home and into the group home we’ve been waiting so long for.

I remember years ago when I was in the depths of my depression I wanted in the worst way and dreamt of having a full time job. I was in no way ready to take on that kind of responsibility and weight and God knew that. He was with me even though I doubted His presence so many times.

It was only when I recovered from the depression and was able to effectively deal with the responsibilities of holding a job did I find employment. The job was very part time and perfect for me just entering the workforce after so many years of being absent. When I decided I wanted more from a job I searched and searched and only by the grace of God did I land this full time job that I have now.

I emailed over my resume and I was called for a phone interview. My future supervisor was going over my resume and whether or not this job is one that suited me and my experience. I tried to gloss over the retail gigs I had listed on my resume since this job at hand was for an RN. I said, “Yes I worked retail, I have a special needs son…I just needed to get out of the house…” The supervisor paused and said, “You know…I’m going to take a chance on you. Im also the mother of a special needs child…”  I almost dropped the phone. Never in a million years did I expect that.

So here I am working a full time job, being a mom and a wife and taking care of my house, etc…. And I’m doing it, it’s happening! Something I wanted so badly and it finally came to be!  My dream came to be a reality on God’s time; not mine.

So I wish you all a very Happy New Year and I hope your dreams come true as we pray to the Great I Am, the holder of all our dreams and timekeeper of their fulfillment.

 

 

I am ready to say farewell to 2016. During this past year my father in law passed away, my Dad was diagnosed with liver and colon cancer. My Mom was diagnosed with bladder cancer. She had to undergo two surgeries with more surgery to come. That is after she finishes chemotherapy.

I took it hard when my Dad was diagnosed but I think I took it harder when my Mom was diagnosed. My Mom has always been the strong one. The “everything  going to be alright” one. When her diagnosis hit I was assaulted with the reality of the mortality of my Mom. I was already reeling from the hit of the same concerning my Dad. My world was out of my control and I wanted the storm to stop. Thankfully I have my faith. I prayed and prayed for both my parents. I prayed for wisdom and clarity for their doctors. Finally I prayed and laid everything at the Lord’s feet. I laid out my fears to Him and I felt a peace about both my parents and their health. No matter what happens it will be according to God’s plan. They are both believers so I am not concerned with their salvation. I am still worried about them but not the frantic panic of incessant worry I felt in the beginning.

I call my mom quite often. I always have. sometimes life gets in the way but I like to touch base with her. When she was recovering from surgery and the diagnosis of her cancer was raw I’d call everyday. As long as I could talk to her everything would be fine is how I felt. I don’t call as often these days. I don’t feel that urgent need anymore. I know that God has his hand on us and we are under His care. Nothing is going to happen that isn’t under His ever present watchful eye. His ways are higher than ours.

 

 

It’s two days before Christmas and I *think* I’m done.  Done shoppping and just about done wrapping presents. This year was different in terms of when and how I did my shopping. It’s the first year of me working full time so I did more online shopping this year. That worked out great as most of the packages were free shipping so yay!

It’s a bit of a somber Christmas what with my father in law passing in October and my Dad battling liver cancer. I’ve learned to not take anyone for granted. You truly never know who will be with you one year and not the next. But God is still good and shows Himself in ways that are always unexpected.

This past school year I was terribly worried about Samantha and which junior high she would attend next year for 6th grade. By the middle of October she was enrolled in a charter school that called me for an unexpected opening they had. This school includes junior high and even high school should Samantha choose to attend. So far it’s been a great experience and I’m glad she made the move. I truly believe God’s hand was on this because the timing was unbelievably perfect. And perfect is the only timing that God knows.

I have another example of God’s perfect timing. I received a phone call from the owner of the agency who runs the group home we’ve been waiting for Thomas to move in to. He called to wish me an early Merry Christmas and tell me that Thomas will be able to move to the group home in January, 2017. My daughter who heard the phone call conversation exclaimed, “God moved!!” She had heard me say enough times that Thomas will move when God wants him to move. Needless to say I’m thrilled for Thomas and our family since this move will make it so much easier to see him and take him out for dinner or shopping or whatever we want to do with him since the group home is 10 minutes from our house.

God is so good and I’m excited to see how He’ll move in the new year.

I have a wonderful, loving husband, healthy children; a great job that I like doing *and* I’ve been working with wonderful, very welcoming people. I can’t ask for more. The only thing I miss slightly  is Manhattan. I wouldn’t give this job up to work full time in the city but it was nice to do so on a part time basis. I miss the commute believe it or not. I liked the ferry and leaving this island where I live for a few hours a day, a few days a week. There’s a certain anonymity you feel when you’re in the city. It’s almost like a mini vacay from your everyday life. I need to get back there.

Merry Christmas!  I hope it is merry and bright.

I’ve been working full time now for about 6-8 weeks. I really like it. I like having a purpose outside of being “Mom” the way I’ve been for pretty much the past 20 years give or take a few years here and there when I worked a part time job.

Our children are at a point in their lives where they don’t require my constant attention. That doesn’t mean they still don’t want my constant attention. Work itself is not particularly stressful. In fact I enjoy the work I do. I like the challenges and meeting and working with different people. Each day is interesting.

The stress isn’t from work. It’s when I get home. I’m not tired from work. I do get tired and stressed from trying to start dinner and help Samantha with her homework at the same time. It was during that certain frustrating scenario that Alyssa proclaimed,”I don’t like ‘working’ Mom”. Because I wasn’t all sweet and patient and more importantly I wasn’t paying attention to her. I will admit that Alyssa did make me laugh with her statement. And I replied, “Well I don’t like, ‘stressed out, trying to help Samantha with her homework Mom'”. We all had a laugh over that one.

You think when your children get older they won’t need you as much. I find the opposite to be true. The older my kids get they do need  attention they need but in a different way. Alyssa needs to talk to me on a daily basis and I love that. Lelly is the same. She needs to touch base with me even if it’s just a text to say hello. Lelly also loves to be hugged. At age 15, it’s really sweet.

I know I’m the same way with my own mother.  I need her attention here and there. I usually speak to my mom a few times a week most recently; everyday. I need to touch base with her and make sure she is “ok”.

 

I’ve been working full time for about 3 weeks now and I really like it. I like being out of the house; I like having a purpose for my days. I  really like being around other people while I’m working. My immediate co workers are other nurses like me and I really enjoy their company and hearing about their backgrounds and their lives. We’re all so different but we all get along and help each other out.

My job is chart abstracting. Which is the technical term for saying I take paper charts and doctor’s notes and put them on a specific computer program that I’ve been trained to use. I find the work to be challenging at times since I don’t know every medical abbreviation out there and doctors aren’t exactly known for having neat handwriting. I like what I do, I don’t find it boring although sitting in front of a computer all day can be challenging. That can be solved by taking a mini break or stretching, getting a glass of water… I really enjoy working with the people who work at the office I’m assigned to. That staff had been wonderful to us. Very helpful and just all around nice.

The most challenging part of working full time is getting dinner on the table and making sure Samantha’s homework is done. My first day of work, when I walked through the door my girls looked at me like “well? Where’s dinner?” I didn’t know which way to turn first. I did think ahead and had chicken defrosted but I felt like I couldn’t cook it fast enough. Oh and let’s not forget about the laundry!

Im so grateful to God for this job. I prayed and prayed for the job I knew God had in store for me and He heard me. He waited for the depression to be lifted and for me to be able to handle working these hours and to be able to care for my family all at the same time. I can’t say when would have been a better time because God’s timing is always perfect. Always.

 

 

 

I worked one day last week to complete training today my new job. After that was the wake and then funeral for my much loved father in law. I offered to my supervisors to return again on Friday after the funeral but they told me to just start on Monday, start new for a new week. To be honest I was grateful they told me to not go in on Friday my head wasn’t together enough to go to work.

So tomorrow I start my first week of my new life. Working full time. It’s going to be an adjustment for us. Everyone is so used to me being here, heck I’m used to me being here, all the time. I’ll have to adjust the most normal things in life like when I’ll go food shopping, when I’ll get my nails done, I’ll have to meal plan, things I never thought of before as a mostly stay at home mom.

My dress code is business casual so I went shopping on Friday for a few things. I’m worried I’ll hate the things I have to wear. I’ve never been in a business casual environment before. Have I mentioned the area I’m working in is very cold. Tommy says it’s because there are a lot of computers, that makes sense. I just wasn’t prepared for the temperature to be that cold. So this past Friday I made sure I purchased a couple of long cardigans. I must say I miss Manhattan already for the great sale rack at Banana Republic.

I keep thinking back to the last real conversation I had with Chick, my father in law. I was telling him about this job, what I would be doing and that it was full time. He was so happy for me. It makes my head spin that in such a short period of time such a drastic life change could take place. I know he’s with our Lord.  I know he’s looking down at us in peace with no more suffering.

So I’ve picked out my clothes and figured out what to take for lunch and have my bag packed for whatever paper work I’ll need. I’m off…tomorrow!

 

This week my family said goodbye to a father, a grandfather, a husband, a father in law, a friend, a neighbor, an all around wonderful man. It was one of the most difficult wakes and funerals I’ve been through. This man was my father in law who treated me as if I were his own daughter. I blogged about him in my last blog post titled “Bye…Babe”. Chick called everyone “Babe”. It was his term of endearment. I always felt his warmth when he called me Babe.

I’m truly going to miss Chick. Or Chicklet as I used to call him. He would smile when I addressed him that way. I can’t believe he’s gone. Just before he became ill I was telling him about my new job. The job I am hired to do now. That is how sudden the decline in his health came upon him. He was happy for me when I told him about the job. But that’s the way Chick was, he would be happy for you, not jealous or envious because you were doing something he wasn’t.

The funeral was so very difficult. It was truly the very final goodbye to a very good man. Marie, my mother in law and his wife broke your heart. She loved him fiercely and him her. When I cried with her she would say to me, “you have no idea how this feels…” and I would just look at her with tears in my eyes and say no I don’t. How could I know how she feels? I can only imagine and I’m sure that isn’t even close.

I’m going to miss Chicklet and his kind and loving manner. The father in law that was more than an “in law” to me.

My father in law, “Chick” passed away early yesterday morning. He was 80 years old and probably the sweetest man you’ll ever meet. I met Chick when I was 17 years old almost 30 years ago. He never failed to make me feel welcome in his home. He always had a smile on his face and a twinkle in those blue eyes. The kind of man people would say, “He’d give you the shirt off his own back” and the truth is Chick actually would do that. He adored his family both blood and by marriage. I never felt like an inlaw with Chick I felt like an actual daughter because he treated me like one.

He loved me like a daughter and I loved him like a father. It was easy to do with Chick. He was warm and affectionate and never failed to make you feel at ease. He adored his grandchildren with an unabashed adoration that was sweet to bear witness to. I will miss him and my children will miss their Poppy. There will never be another Chick nor should there be, he was truly one of a kind.