Hi my name is Menay and I have a handbag problem. I really do.  I call myself a handbag whore. It used to be shoes well… who am I kidding it’s still shoes but I started to fall in love with purses I’d say within the past 10 years or so. Even since I stopped carrying diaper bags and lugging my kids’ stuff wherever we went. Even when I had Samantha I didn’t use a traditional diaper bag. Most days when we went out, say when she was about 8 months old I just shoved a couple of diapers in what ever purse I was using and we were out the door. She was breast fed so even in the beginning when she was an infant I didn’t really “need” a full on diaper bag. She was the youngest of 4 so you use your experience and stop bringing everything and the kitchen sink when we went out.

So back to me being a handbag whore. It just happened I swear and I can’t help it, especially now that I’m working and have a bit of money. And before anyone gets all judgey on me take a look around we all have our “thing” that sets our hearts on fire. That thing that we can’t help but love and must have more of. To some it’s summer shoes, some sunglasses and others boots…just to name a few without naming the actual person who I know has those obsessions/wants/must haves.

I love all my bags I do have certain favorites but sometimes they aren’t always practical to care such as a top handle hand carry handbag in the rain. Trying to balance an umbrella and hand carry purse in the rain just stinks and I’ve learned my lesson. I can change bags up to three times a week. Each has a specific function and most have a place in my heart. A lot of my bags I’m sentimentally attached to believe it or not. I’ve sold a few here and there but those weren’t bags that made my heart sing or were given to me as gifts.

There are others out there like me; bag whores. I met one at work and we were both so happy we met!  She is a nurse like me doing chart abstracting and she was carrying a gorgeous Rebecca Minkoff purse. She admired my black Tory Burch. What an awesome common ground to have! We ended up becoming fast friends not just because of our purses but because we had other things to talk about of course. But it was still nice to have that common ground.

So here’s to all my fellow bag lovers out there and our husbands who try to understand and are generous enough to give up precious closet and armoire space for the sake of their wives’ shoes and bags.

 

 

In a couple of days I’ll say goodbye to my Brooklyn assignment. I’m not sorry to go. I won’t miss the traffic to and from work and I certainly won’t miss alternate side of the street parking days.  The people who drive in Brooklyn are totally a different bunch. If you don’t have your foot poised and ready to go on the gas pedal when the light turns green you get unmercifully honked at. If you’re double parked to slip into someone’s space after they leave you better have those hazard lights on. If you don’t know how to parallel park you’d better learn; fast.  These are the life lessons I’ve been taught here in Brooklyn. I’ve also noticed I’m a less patient driver when I’m home in my own borough. Hopefully that will work itself out. I don’t hate it here, it’s just different from what I’m used to. I went shopping on my lunch break today.  Something I’m not able to do when I work in my home area. I ran to the Gap to make a return and of course couldn’t leave without seeing what was on sale. Then I literally ran back to work to scarf down a yogurt so I wouldn’t be too hungry later.

The people at this office have been very nice and accommodating to us. I’ve been chatty with the office manager and she’s very sweet and genuine. The other front desk people and secretaries are also really nice to be around. The doctors we’ve been interacting with have been quite interesting. Some have more personality than others and some just don’t talk to you at all; very strange. I’ve met one gastroenterologist who is into handbags like me, I though that was pretty cool.

I’d say the best part about being here is that I’ve made a new friend. She’s also a nurse abstracting charts but she only works 3 days a week. She’s younger than me, like 24 ish, but she’s really cool and mature and so nice to be around. I hope we get to work together again.

So I’ll soak up Brooklyn in my last days here. Farewell Gyro restaurant across the street, goodbye Gap store two blocks down, goodbye loud subway train a half block away…its been real.

 

 

 

Anger. It can tear you apart, keep you up at night, color your vision of other people… I remember I used to be an angry person. I was angry at my brother. I won’t go into specifics; it is unnecessary. We all have someone in our lives that has made us more angry than we thought we were capable of ever being. I carried that anger around for years and it didn’t feel good to live that way.

I have forgiven my brother. And the anger has gone away. He’s my brother. Not one of us is perfect, we are afterall sinful by nature. And God has mercy on us regardless. He doesn’t give us what we really deserve for our sins thanks to the price Jesus paid on that cross. By following Christ we are instructed to become “Christlike” be more like him and less like ourselves; a sinful human. So in forgiving people who have done wrong to us we are acting as Jesus has commanded us. This is not to say we aren’t to have barriers or distance from those who have hurt us or become a doormat. Not at all.  By forgiving we release ourselves from the anger we have towards that person. I know I’m my experience once I have forgiven the person who hurt me eventually I feel empathy towards that person and there’s an understanding that comes upon me recognizing that that person wasn’t well or wasn’t in their right mind to do such hurtful things. I don’t necessarily forget what was done and/or said but I don’t become blinded with anger at the memory.  After all, forgiveness is what God does all day for us when we sin whether it be by thought, word or deed.

We only have one go round in this life. I choose to not live mine filled with anger. I also chose to follow the Lord Jesus Christ and forgive accordingly. I know I’m sinful and I know I need a Savior and God in my life. I know God forgives me for the many sins I commit and is patient with me; oh so patient. Why would I not at least try to be that way to others? I’m far, far from perfect. And God still forgives me.

 

She’s 16 years old. My “baby” before Samantha came along. My Daniella. She got the nick name “Lelly” from Thomas not being able to say Daniella. It started out at Da-lella and for whatever reason ended up at Lelly. We all still call her that although I notice in front of her friends, especially if it’s a large group, I’ll say Daniella.

Suxteen…my strong willed little girl is now a strong willed young lady. She’s stylish, she’s sweet and she talks to me. Actually talks to me, about her fears, her future, school… and other things I never thought she’d tell me as her mom. I hope she keeps on talking to me because I cherish those talks.

Lelly and Alyssa are best friends. I know that can be rare but they really do enjoy each other’s company. They talk, fight, make up, laugh and laugh some more. They are each other’s confidants. They even include Samantha in “sister time” and it’s incredible to see your kids get along like that.

She loves the Lord and is not ashamed of her faith or beliefs. She has and will argue with teachers over the theory of evolution. The first time was in junior high and I couldn’t have been more proud. My girl stands up for what she believes in and that is awesome. She won’t shrink down. I should have seen this coming about her since she was always a child with a willful streak, I’m thankful that willfulness has been contained and she unleashes it in a manner that can only be described as polite and intentional.

So sixteen, the time both went very fast and very slow depending on the times of our lives. I’m glad God gave me this child to raise up to a young woman. I can’t imagine life without her.

Prayer. I firmly believe in it. Prayer is powerful. The problem is we don’t want God to answer “no”. Or “not yet”. God always hears us, no matter what the question, plea, or cry. He doesn’t ignore the prayers of His children. I know every Christian can testify to answered prayer even when that answer wasn’t what they wanted at that moment.

I remember when I was suffering from depression. It was more than oh woe is me I’m sad depressed… it was bad, clinical depression. I used to pray for God to take it away, to take away the depression. I would also pray for Him to guide my doctor in his choice of medicines he was prescribing me. God is afterall the great physician. God did guide my doctor I know this as fact, God chose this doctor for me so I had to trust my doctor and submit to his knowledge of how to treat depression. There were times I cursed the medications that didn’t work or had horrid side effects but it was not my doctor’s fault. Nor was it God’s fault. Finally my doctor hit the right combo of meds for me and the depression lifted and I was able to live and laugh again. Be a happier Mom and wife. It was great to feel like myself again. And I owe this to God, my doctor and prayer. My prayers and the people who were praying for me, people I didn’t even know.

My mom recently had major surgery. I prayed to God that he would guide the surgeon and the nurses to give my mom the best care possible. I placed my faith in The Lord. I’ve  laid both my parents at the Lord’s feet, I couldn’t carry the worry about them any further. I know they are believers and are saved. Thy will be done. It’s powerful to truely lay your worries at the feet of Jesus. There are so many times we lie them down then take them back,  lie them down again and take them back, rinse; repeat. I haven’t taken the worry about my parents back. I know my God will answer my prayers for them in the way He sees fit. My parents have people all over the country praying for them. I don’t think anyone could ask for anything more.

Prayer. It’s more than asking for favor or for things. It’s also for worship. Glorifying the one true God. Thanking the Lord Jesus Christ for going to the cross for us. Thanking God for all He has provided and the people He has placed in our lives, our jobs, our children…The list can go on and on. God hears you when you talk to him. He hears our prayers.

Ugh! Those two words are enough to send shivers down anyone’s spine. I went to the dentist yesterday morning after being in pain all day Friday. I was at work and had a hard time concentrating on charts while pain was shooting from my upper gum to lower jaw.

After seeing my dentist,  describing my symptoms and having an X-ray, Dr. I determined that I needed a root canal. Today. I agreed while holding back tears. The last root canal I had done was horrible. The guy was a butcher who left me in pain for days after the first visit. After the second visit he finished the root canal and I was still sore. Then the office called me to say I owed them money because their receptionist quoted me the wrong fee *after* I paid them in full.  No I did not want to return to that guy… And I reminded my dentist of that fiasco. Dr. I contacted a different endodondist who told me to “come now”.  I walked back home to tell Tommy and jump in my car to go.

Dr Mirman was wonderful as was his staff. After I arrived and determined that yes I wanted the sweet air/nitrous, I was led to an exam room and the assistant immediately set me up with the nitrous. Dr. Mirman came in a few minutes later to introduce himself and give me Novocain. He said, ” I don’t want you to feel anything at all” I thanked him and felt like I was in good hands. When he started the assistant put head phones on me with music playing to drown out the drill. I thought that was great!

I have no idea how long the root canal took but the next thing I knew it was over. Done. The whole thing was done in one visit. They took an X-ray and I was out the door and on my way to Samantha’s softball game. I was a bit sore yesterday but nothing Tylenol couldn’t handle. I was still able to go thrifting and then on to the mall later. Yes I was fine 😉.

If anyone local needs a root canal I highly recommend Dr.Mirman in Oakwood.

 

 

This past Friday another abstractor nurse and I were asking for more charts to abstract and wondered aloud how many more had to be completed? One of the office staff overheard us and offered to take us to the “chart room”. There we found files and more files of charts that had to be abstracted. Wow was all I could say. I was hoping the two piles they gave us were all that were left; haha! Guess not.

I don’t hate it here, really I don’t. The ride in, even with traffic is not that bad, I get right off the Belt Parkway after 2 exits and today being a Monday (no opposite side of the street parking) I found a parking space pretty quickly hence me having enough time to blog.

I must say being here in this neighborhood has changed the way I see Brooklyn or rather has educated me on what I thought was the norm rather than the excellent. The biggest misconception was that Brooklyn was mostly apartments. Nope not here. There are a ton of private detached homes and they are beautiful and wonderfully kept.  There are many apartment buildings and multi family houses but not as much as I had originally pictured in my mind when I learned I’d be working here.

I can now parallel park with the best of them. I rarely to never parallel park where I live, it simply isn’t necessary most of the time since parking is pretty plentiful in most places.  But here in Brooklyn… you better get your game on and remember what you were taught in drivers ed boy! There is rarely a space you can park in by going head on. Spaces that I never would have attempted at home figuring I’d never fit…well I managed to fit this fairly big SUV that I drive. I’m still pretty proud of myself no matter how many times I do it.

There are a ton of stores under the “L”. I only went as far as the corner pizzeria, but last week the nurse I was working with wanted Burger King and I went along for the walk. Oh my goodness I had no idea what was there beyond the corner, lol! I’m not looking to shop while I’m here so my wallet is safe. I seriously had no idea the shopping Mecca that is 86 street under the L. Btw I was just honked at while crossing the street for not crossing fast enough. Good morning!

 

 

He’ll be 21 years old in 3 months, I still call him “the boy”. He’s taller than me yet he still bends down to hug me so that his head is on my shoulder. Thomas is home for Easter. Tommy picked him up yesterday and Thomas is looking forward to going to church, he asked me last night if we were going. I’m happy he’s looking forward to church. It shows you how Thomas soaks things up when you don’t think he’s even paying attention.  I’ve talked to him about God during our trips to and from his school. I’ve told him that Jesus loves him; and when I say that Thomas has the biggest smile on his face

I don’t think I’ve written about the women staff at his residential school. Thomas came home one weekend and he told me about the music the women play at his school. Music with songs about God. I asked him again just to clarify and he said the same thing again. I was so happy that even though I couldn’t get him to church the Lord was making sure Thomas knew of his love. So one night when I called to talk to Thomas, I asked Danny, one of the staff about the music Thomas told me about. The staff member stammered a little bit nervously and explained that the women staff “sometimes” play music for the residents. I quickly assured Danny that is was ok seriously.  That we are Christian and I was very happy that Thomas was listening to worship music. I realize that conversation could have gone a very different way had we not been believers. But God knows what he’s doing and placed these Christian women in Thomas’ life for a reason. All of the staff have been in his life for one reason or another.

Thomas’ social worker is amazing. She’s gone out of her way to care for Thomas. She takes him shopping and they love going to IHOP together with the nurse manager. Lest I forget the nurses. They’ve been wonderful in keeping me updated with med changes and any other issues that arise.

We’re still waiting for Thomas to move into the group home here where we live. As far as I know the state has his paperwork and they’ve requested updated evaluations. As far as I’m concerned it’s a step forward no matter how small. I’ve handed this situation over to The Lord. Thomas will move when the time is right for him to move.

I’d like to wish everyone a Happy Easter ! I hope all of us recognize this holiday for what it really means; that our Savior lives and death was defeated! We serve a mighty, awesome God!

Easter. The day our Savior has risen from the dead. After he took on the sins of he world so you and I could come to the Father. It’s not about a bunny. Although I will admit my kids knew all about the Easter bunny before they knew all about Christ. Back in those days none of us were saved and never went to church and it took a boy playing basketball to get us to go to church.

When Thomas was around 11 or 12 years old he played basketball for our church league called “Upward”. It’s a nationwide Christian league that other churches also participate in. They do other sports too but our church only does basketball. The man in charge of upward st our church asked me to have Thomas attend a practice session so they could meet him. I’ll never forget sitting on the bleachers watching Thomas play during that practice. After it was over Stan (the man in charge) approached me to tell me that the first game was that Saturday and what size uniform would Thomas need? I wasn’t sure they would take a chance with Thomas playing basketball. All the other boys on the team were typical children. I was also worried that the kids wouldn’t accept Thomas being that he is special needs. I couldn’t have been more wrong. The other boys accepted him with such grace and even helped him to score baskets. Thomas’ catch phrase became “right in!  It went right in!” He was remarkably gifted at scoring from the 3 point line, it was amazing.

Alyssa and Lelly also played on their own teams so every Saturday for 10 weeks we got to watch our kids as a family play a great sport with awesome coaches. My best friend’s daughters played on the same teams as my girls so there was plenty of very loud cheering from us in the bleachers.

During an Upward basketball game, at halftime there would be a devotional. Usually a shortened explanation of the Gospel tailored to the age group of kids playing. They would also go over the Bible verse the kids were to have memorized that week. Well wouldn’t you know those devotionals really struck my heart. I realized I needed Jesus in my life. We started going to Salem church because we were invited to a service that was to highlight the basketball players and their families.  I was hooked. The music was incredible! The songs hit me right between the eyes and most of the time I sang while holding back tears. It was the first time I heard worship music that sang to my soul. Soon we became regulars. Then I was baptized, then my daughters were baptized. I was so happy for them that they chose to follow Christ and have God in their lives. And to think it all started with a boy playing basketball.

This Sunday is more than chocolate candy and a bunny. It’s the day we proclaim He is risen indeed! It’s about God and His  Son and the Holy Spirit. Three in one.

For God so loved the world he gave his only begotten son that who so ever believes in him shall have ever lasting life (John 3:16) God loves us that much. It took me a long time to be able to accept that love. I felt unworthy of such.  Only through prayer and hearing the Gospel and believing in our Lord did I finally get it. He loves you as you are and will meet you where you are; wherever that place may be. It happened to me. The Lord met me when I was angry with God and it was nothing but a loving, extraordinary experience.

Sunday I will exclaim He is risen indeed! With gratitude and joy. Jesus is the risen Savior!

 

 

 

It stinks. Not that this is news to anyone in the tri-state area. I spent about 45 minutes looking for parking this morning. What complicated matters even more was that today is Wednesday and you have to worry about opposite side of the street parking rules where you cannot park on one side of the street due to street cleaning that occurs. So am already dire parking situation is made worse by those rules. To be honest I don’t even know which direction to walk to get to work I just kept turning down side streets in search of that elusive, legal parking space.

So today I parked a billion blocks away (not really it only felt that way while walking).  And I didn’t even know which direction to walk in to get to work. Thank God for cell phones and GPS. I am about 6-7 blocks away from the building where I work. It was quite the walk but the weather is nice this morning so all in all it wasn’t that bad. And I know I shouldn’t be complaining…

Judging by how many charts appear to be left to abstract (that is unless there’s a hidden lot of them that I don’t know about) my time here in Brooklyn may be short lived. And to all my Brooklyn native friends I apologize for not loving this borough as you do, I guess I’m just a Staten Island gal at heart. I’ve failed to find the charm here and admire this borough as I admire and love Manhattan.

I will say geography aside almost every person I’ve come in contact with who is a Brooklyn native has been nothing but warm and friendly to me. So there must be something here that makes the people so great. It certainly isn’t the lack of parking I can tell you that, or the traffic on the Belt Parkway.

It’s funny because I love Manhattan due to the anonymity it provides. You can be walking in the deepest of crowds and feel alone and anonymous. Here in Brooklyn it isn’t like that, the atmosphere is different. The people walking aren’t in such a hurry (only the cars driving by, or God forbid you don’t move as soon as the light turns green when you’re driving). The people here are for the most part friendly and the staff here at this office are helpful.

Now if we could just do away with opposite side of the street parking all would be right with the world…